You can only join the dots looking backwards

Geoff Roberts change

I have just been reading an address by Steve Jobs to Stanford University and was especially struck by this quote:

…you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.

Perhaps the more academically inclined amongst us might call this ‘post-hoc rationalisation’

It’s certainly my experience that I can often string a convincing story together about what happened despite those happenings being unplanned. Now what I am about to say may well be blasphemous to those who worship at the altar of Change Management Theory (and I too have a Masters’ degree in the topic!) but in many years of leading change I do not think I have ever seen a successful change process follow any of these theories. Oh yes, in general it pays to create your Compelling Vision before your Guiding Coalition – and sometimes the other way round!

Shortly after finishing my Masters my then boss asked “What was the most significant thing you learned on the course?” My response seemed trite at the time, yet the more experience I gathered, the more significant it became. I was fortunate that I was leading the process facilitation team for a major organisational change effort whilst I was doing my Masters and my response was that “I have learned that practice is more important than theory and that in practice you have to do what you can, where you can, when you can”.

I once wrote a paper that described in wondefully rational terms how our long-term success (over a 10-15 year period) could be attributed to overlapping cycles of change, each starting before the full benefits of the previous cycle had been realised. It was pure post-hoc rationalisation – the paper implied some form of ‘master plan’ which never existed. We did what we could where we could when we could. We joined up the dots looking backwards.

So than you Steve Jobs for reminding me that all the theory is useful in the planning phase of change and also for reminding me of the reality that things rarely (ever?) go to plan so although the dots might well join up in retrospect, they are unlikely to make the picture that you thought you were making!

Do a bit, learn a bit…

Geoff Roberts change

I have spent some of today redesigning the look of this blog, using (if you are interested) a very handy design creation tool called Artisteer. It now looks different to how it looked at 10:00 or at 12:00 or even at 14:00 – and may well look different again before the end of the day! “So what?” you might ask, and quite rightly so. Well, I realised that this redesign was a bit, actually quite a lot, like redesigning how we live.

I started with a recognition that something needed to change – maybe different fonts, maybe layout etc… – wondered how to go about making the changes, sought out a tool to help me then started playing with the tool, all along being aware that my fisrt efforts would take time whilst I learned how to make the change then knowing that I could change things bit by bit and review the results before finally committing; even then I know that further changes can be made – and that small changes can be done quickly and easily.

So, what has this got to do with a personal development blog? Well, it stuck me that there are some very similar lessons:

  1. Sometimes we just have a feeling that ‘something needs to change’, without being really sure what
  2. Sometimes we struggle alone before realising that someone else might be able to help
  3. Sometimes we have to change several things at once, yet other times we can simplify it and make one change at a time
  4. Some changes are easy, some take more practice
  5. Sometimes we make a change only to find that it’s still not quite right and needs further adjustment
  6. When we think we have finished, we have not finished – there is always more to do.

So, back to the title of this piece “Do a bit, learn a bit”. It is only when we actually make a change that we find out whether or not it is an appropriate change. Those changes can be quite small yet have a profound effect. Go on, make a change in your life today…

Taking responsibility

Geoff Roberts change

I was speaking with a wonderful, educated, passionate, articulate homeless man this morning.

Firstly, the discussion reminded me that you don’t have to be (to use a non-PC term) the ‘dregs of society’ to become homeless these days.

Then I asked “So what was it that helped you take those first steps back out of the hole you were in?” His response is a lesson for many. His reply was telling:

“I decided that I had to take responsibility for myself”.

This wonderful man recognised, even in the depths of despair, that it was up to him and him alone to accept his part in his past. Yes, others had their part to play in his past and his ‘downfall’; Yes, he would and did accept help from others; and most of all, Yes he could and would take personal responsibility in preference to blaming others. He is far from where he wants to be, yet he is also far from where he was – the journey is long and hard and he knows that only he can make the journey. I wished him well before I went off to my warm home, wonderful wife, well stocked pantry…

So my challenge is for you to answer these two questions:

  1. “To what extent are you prepared to accept that you have you contributed to any problems in your life?”
  2. “Are you going to take responsibility for yourself, your past and your future – or do you want to be comfortable and blame others?”

No regrets

Geoff Roberts change

When I am coaching face-to-face I often finish with a story – they are intended to be metaphorical and designed so that the subject can make their own sense of them. However, every now and again, one story sticks with me personally – this piece, usually accredited to Nadine Stair aged 85, is one:

If I had my life over…

I’d dare to make more mistakes next time

I’d relax, I’d limber up

I would be sillier than I have been this trip

I would take fewer things seriously

I would take more chances

I would take more trips

I would climb more mountains and swim more rivers

I would eat more ice cream and less beans

I would perhaps have more actual troubles but I’d have fewer imaginary ones

You see I am one of those people who live sensibly and sanely hour after hour, day after day

Oh, I’ve had my moments and if I had to do it over again I would have more of them,

in fact I’d try to have nothing else – just moments.

One after another instead of living so many years ahead of each day

I’ve been one of those people who never go anywhere without a thermometer, a hot water bottle, a raincoat and a parachute

If I had to do it again, I would travel lighter next time

If I had my life to live over, I would start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall

I would go to more dances

I would ride more merry go rounds

I would pick more daisies.

Ms Stair’s tale reminds us that it is not the things we have done that we will regret but the things we have not done.

So here’s the challenge, to have a quick think about how many days have gone past with you (me) regretting what you have not done? Then take action. What is there that you want to do but have yet to fulfil? Make a plan. Go and do it.

Just being there…

Geoff Roberts change

We were working yesterday with a team who were confidently (?) expecting to hear very bad news later in the day. We had a great day planned, the final day of a series over the last few months – but we were not aware of the imminent news until we arrived at the venue. It was clear that what we had planned was unlikely to happen – not only were people less than enthusiastic about the session anyway but their minds were going to be elsewhere…a rapid replanning was needed.
So instead of them coming to us, we went to them in their workplace with all our rapport skills being dragged out of the cupboard. This was one of those situations where it was more important to deal with what they needed rather than what the plan suggested; indeed, it was probably more important to just be there acknowledging and empathising with their concerns than to offer any ‘training’.
Sometimes, and especially in the heat of the moment when significant change is happening, that’s all we can and need to do – just be there and empathise. This is a really important message for ‘change professionals’ and personnel/HR people who, because of their frequent exposure to the processes of change, risk becoming inured to the personal challenges faced by individuals at such times. I was reminded of something that a very wise colleague of mine said about dealing with change, he said that we needed to be “tough on the issues, gentle with the people”. We need to make a decision and be clear about the reasons and that a decision has been made, then we MUST treat people as individuals with individual concerns and responses to the change they face; we MUST treat every individual with respect and help them deal with the change they face at their own pace and in their own way.
Sometimes, just being there is what is needed.